New Start

Hello :)

I know it has been a VERY long time since I blogged. Blogging used to be one of my passions. I lost that passion after my life went to pieces. I am nowhere near being healed but I am in the process. I am trying to find rediscover old passions and discover new ones. I looked in all the wrong places for "temporary happiness". I looked to alcohol, boys who used me and didn't really care about me, and friends that only liked me if I was partying. I have dated guys completely wrong for me, done things I am not proud of, and I can't take any of that back. But I can change from my old ways and try and be a better me.

It is 2012. I can't believe I will be 22 this upcoming march. I feel SOOO old. I feel like I haven't accomplished much with my life either. Today something hit me. I don't know if it was the Lord intervening or if it was just an epiphany, maybe a little bit of both but I know that it hit me hard in the face. I need to stop mourning what I lost and start appreciating everything in my life and what I have been blessed with. I have so much that I want to do with my life. The Lord has not given up on me and he wants to work in my life, even if I am one of the most stubborn people on this earth and like to do things my way. I need to stop searching and just live. I need to live and enjoy every moment of life whether those moments are good or bad. When I am going through hell. Praise him. When I am going through some of the best moments of my life. Praise him. When I am at a crossroad in my life. Praise him. Moral of the story is no matter what I am going through I need to look to him, seek him, and praise him. I have been doing things my way for far too long. I am kind of a control freak and like things done my way. We have seen how that has gone. ha. I know I am going to struggle and nothing is EVER going to be perfect. But that is the beauty of life. That not everything is always going to go my way but thats okay because I learn through the tough times and know that there is a purpose for everything under the sun.

I created my bucket list. This has been a long time coming. I always thought about making one but never really took the time and sat down and wrote one. I wrote a rough draft of one today ha. I will be editing it, typing it up, and adding to it constantly. I want to live life with the passion I had before I went to college. I had so much potential and so much passion and that was all lost within the last four years. I would like to get that back. It's not going to be easy but I am not looking for easy I am looking for possible. I know I cannot take back anything I have done but I can learn from it and use it as a testimony :)

So thats where you, yes you :) come in. I need LOTS AND LOTS of support. I would like to find a church to go to, nothing against Abiding Savior because they have guided me throughout most of my life, but they have a gap there. I am looking for a strong, bible based church where there is an abudance of young adults my age who seek Jesus and have a passion and a heart for him and a passion for people. I would like to find accountability partners. People I can go to to help me through anything life throws at me. Im looking for people that are honest with me, that wont sugar coat things because people have been sugar coating things for me for far too long. I am looking for friends who want the same things as me and I want Jesus to work in us.

Heres to the new year and to finding myself :) finally


Gigi