Love

I found this from someones blog and liked it so much I wanted to pass it on. This is how my heart is feeling.


to the older men:

you are all doing a great job turning into the men God wants you to be. don’t be scared of the future and never let anyone tell you that you are worth less than you are. you are mighty, courageous and have everything you need already inside you. but i do ask one thing of you during your season of growth: be careful with hearts. it seems odd to say, as if all of you are merciless heartbreakers — i know you’re not, but please. hear me out. we are all broken people. we all have wounds from our parents, from our peers, from people we love and respect and even from people we barely know. sometimes we don’t know we’re wounded so we can’t ask for healing from Jesus. sometimes we know and we ask and it takes time. no one will ever be perfectly healed or 100% fixed in this age, but i want to make a point. when you are wounded in the deepest parts of your heart, you are virtually unable to engage in a healthy, romantic relationship with someone else without the great risk of wounding them and vice versa. until you fully love God, you can’t fully love someone else. and she will end up taking a place in your heart that isn’t rightfully hers. she can’t fix you. in the long run, she won’t make you feel better. sure, she loves you and would do anything for you, but she can’t do what you need. use this time ever so wisely. draw nearer to Jesus and let him refine you for the time when He will give you the woman He has chosen for you. your perfect match. she won’t be perfect, but she will be perfect for you.

until that point, please. please. just out of wisdom - save the “i love you”s until there is a ring. i know a lot of people that sidestep this and do fine, but i have been a casualty MANY times over and it’s just so much better this way. whatever you think, they aren’t just three little words. they’re three BIG words that everyone has been waiting to hear since they day they could breathe.

and until that ring is on that finger, don’t say things like “when you’re my wife,” or “when we get married”. she will cling to those words and God-forbid anything happens or goes wrong, but if it does, those words that used to be so sweet in her ear will turn to bitter poison so quickly.

we women know you’re trying. you don’t have it figured out anymore than we do. and heartbreak is a part of life. people change minds and that’s okay. life changes, hearts change, what we want changes and our ability to receive more love from God changes. so please, don’t take this as a note of condemnation. i love you boys more than anything — like my brothers. and i want you so badly to honestly treat us like sisters the way you’re supposed to. 1 tim 5:2 “Treat older women as you would your mother, and treat younger women with all purity as you would your own sisters.”

even if you have made mistakes, broken hearts — broken girls, said i love yous too early, it’s okay. you’re not horrible. but you do have an obligation to do better the next time around. i know you’re all going to make it. you’re going to be great. just like peter from the chronicles of narnia.. you’re going to be magnificent. i believe in you. God believes in you. just be careful with us.

to the young boys:

my little brothers. the world is bright and beautiful before you. never lose that sparkle in your eye, the joy in your laughter or the extra bounce in your step. life will present itself with new challenges every day — you can face them. you can overcome them. and you will be stronger and better because of it. never fear anything, the world is yours. you are beyond precious in Jesus’ eyes and i know that’s not the manliest word for you, but believe me. He loves the fight in your heart and in your spirit. He made you that way, after all. let me just say this — it’s okay. it’s okay to be scared, it’s okay to be confused, it’s okay to have no idea what’s going on. believe me, i’m twenty-four almost and i feel the same way :). that being said, now is not the time to focus on your lady friends. i know their attention feels amazing and you have so many feelings all at once and so many things you want to say to them. but the problem here is that so many of them have ears that BURN for the things you want to say. referencing timothy again - treat all women with the purity of sisters. it’s not all innocent love. it’s not all fun and games. real feelings are just that— real. i don’t doubt that you may feel ‘in love’. don’t let anyone judge you on that. what you feel is exactly what you feel and no one else can tell you otherwise. love and it’s definition will change over time for you. but i promise, if you focus on growing into the man of God you want to be, enjoying your friendships and spending time building healthy, godly relationships (friends or otherwise) with those around you, you will be a much happier person as time goes on. don’t worry about anything. fitting in seems important now, and goodness sakes do i remember how it felt to not fit in, but let me tell you this. God defines you. nothing in this life has any hold on you, any say on who you’re going to become. you choose who you want to be and God’s love and strength will get you there. enjoy this time with your sisters and keep it at just that. my heart literally breaks for you, my brothers. this whole letter was spurred on by a random facebook posting i read between two young kids i used to know. barely in high school. exchanging ‘i love yous’ and ‘you’re the love of my life’. even if she is… she’s not. be wise in your words and actions. GUARD your heart for it is the wellspring of life. - words to live by. i love you my little brothers. you are, and who you are turning into is going to be great.

to the older women:

they never warned us properly. they think they did. but they didn’t. or if they did we would have listened, right? … wrong. my beloveds, we were told to guard our hearts. we were told that beautiful but ridiculously cliché somethingsomething about ‘a woman should be so veiled by God that a man has to go through Him to find her’. yeah. very true. but so few of us grasped that concept in proper time. can i just say a few things? and do not doubt me on this, my darlings; do not figure that i am being polite, or that i say these things because i do not know you therefore i do not know what i am talking about. i speak with wisdom towards you and from God’s heart into mine to yours.

YOU. ARE. BEAUTIFUL.

you are. every inch of you, every bit you don’t like. you don’t believe me? you don’t think i know what i’m talking about? beloveds, i had a list, a real factual list of things i hated about myself. “..my wrists. my fingers. my shoulders. my nose when i smile. my smile. that one tooth that sticks out just a bit. my hair. my toes. my calves. my skin. my knees. my legs. my shoulder blades..” it almost came down to the fact that i hated every inch of my body. i spent years idolizing other people. wishing down to my bones i could be someone else or look like someone else. i felt like i was surely a mistake. that i was formed out of some broken mold. everyone else was beautiful — why wasn’t i? oh! how i wish i could take the years back so i could have embraced myself! i wish i could go back in time and either slap myself or hug myself or both. we are beautiful. do you know how PapaDaddy God feels when we say things like that about ourselves? He hurts. He so desperately wants us to see ourselves how He see us. not how others see us — not even how we see ourselves. there are evil spirits that come to us when we stand before our mirror — the new idol of this age — and they whisper lies to us. lies we think are our thoughts. lies about how things would be better if they were different. if something was bigger. if something else was smaller. STOP. stop listening. break all agreements with those lies. you are precious. isaiah 62:4 “but you shall be called hephzibah..for the Lord delights in you”. God delights in you. DELIGHTS. in YOU. delight is another way of saying ‘great pleasure’. Papa takes great pleasure in you. let Him define you. He created you, He loved you, He died for you so much because He wants to spend eternity with you. we chase these unfaithful lovers searching for the one who will love us with all they have — yet we fail to realize that was Jesus. fall in love with Him first, then fall in love with a man. but that being said, you don’t need a man to tell you you’re beautiful. you don’t need a man to feel loved. you don’t need to have men chase after you so you can feel like you have value. give all of those hurts to Jesus and i promise promise He will sew your wounded heart back together better than before. and i promise promise, when your heart is beautifully fixed by Jesus, it will be the best gift that your husband could ever receive. give it away at the right time. and ask the Holy Spirit when that time is. and please, do not do what i did. LISTEN if the Holy Spirit says no. even if he’s beautiful. even if he’s perfect. even if everything looks awesome from where you stand. because the destruction that lies in wait for you is unbelievably and on occasion unbearably painful. let Jesus fix your heart, then guard it, then don’t awaken love until it’s time, and then ask the Holy Spirit when it’s time. that’s the recipe for true love. the kind you’re waiting for.

to the younger girls:

oh. my beautiful little sisters. i look upon you with just the slightest twinge of jealousy. i never looked that good when i was your age. your hair, your skin, your eyes. you’re intensely beautiful. you’re radiant. do you know why? it’s your heart. proverbs 27:19 “As in water face reflects face, So a man’s heart reveals the man.” your beautiful heart reflects out into your beautiful face. i implore you, keep it that way. listen to your daddy on earth if He is of good heart and good conscience and even moreso, listen to your Papa in heaven. there is nothing more painful to watch than a young girl get her heart brutally broken in a time that wasn’t right. enjoy your youth. i know, everyone says that. but believe me. you have plenty of time to wear make up, fret about what cute boy is staring at you, and whether or not so and so like-likes you. because it doesn’t change much, even when you twenty-four. but the difference is embracing who you are. not being afraid to be different. we were all made in God’s image, but it’s not like he only had four parts, or eight parts to that image as if there are only 4 or 8 different types of people on the earth. we were created in His image and from His heart. that means each one of you has specific aspects of the Father shining out from you. cherish those parts. just like you can look at your face and see features from your earthly father, you can look at your heart, your personality, your spirit and see features like PapaDaddy’s. you are beautiful. you are loved. you are worth more than all of the stars and all of the seas and all of the whole earth. and i’m not just saying that - Jesus said so. He couldn’t bear the thought of losing you for one second that He stepped up to that cross and held on tight through all of the pain, all of the agony so that you, my darling little sister, would know how much He really loves you. it’s a mad crazy time right now, isn’t it? the world around you is changing… even in the short years it’s been since i was your age, it’s an entirely different ballgame. but you know what doesn’t change? God. and His Word. He is the same yesterday, today, and forever, and His Word will endure forever. so even though things are complex and there is a lot in your heart and in your mind, the way God feels about you will never change. He wants to protect you, to hedge you in, to hide you away in the cleft of the rock for His glory. let Him love you. let Him use His loving hands to mold your heart into the most beautiful shape. it won’t be easy all the time and sometimes it will hurt. but it will be glorious. and these boys? they’re twice as confused as you are. believe me. they don’t understand a word of what they’re saying or what they’re doing. when you feel that little pinprick in your spirit — when your tummy does a little jump — listen to it. know that if you listen to your heart you won’t go wrong, but your heart has to listen to Jesus first. it’s okay to be too young for things. like i said, there will be plenty of time for you to grow up. but you have to enjoy the process. be the beautiful young girl you are. spread your love and your joy to others. don’t let anyone or anything draw you away from God. nothing is better, nothing and no one will love you more, and He will NEVER hurt you the way they can. but He can fix all things. if you have been broken, hurt, confused or abused in one way or the other — never fear. it’s not permanent. it feels like it is though, doesn’t it? i assure you there is hope. it’s not. Jesus fixes all of it. every last bit. but you have to let Him fix it. like i said to the older women — fall in love with Jesus. when you do, after a few years go by, you will be even more of a beautiful creation — your countenance will still shine but now it will shine Jesus’ face. and to a god-fearing man, that’s irresistible. but that’s down the road, maybe many years. so while you wait. while you be patient and slow down from all this growing up you’re trying so hard to do, just focus your pretty little eyes upon Jesus. look full in His wonderful face, and the things of this world, will grow strangely dim, in the light of His glory and grace.


His Beloved,

Grace