Chivalry Lives

I am taking this from a sermon I heard last week at Central Baptist. It really spoke to me and I feel called to share this with you. The man who shared the sermon is Jeff Wheeler who is the lead pastor at Central. I am sharing bits of the sermon and then putting my thoughts into them.

When you think of Chivalry what do you think? Do you think of the ‘50s? Or things older generations did? Do you believe chivalry is dead? Do you believe it lives? If it lives today, what does it look like?

The definition of Chivalry is: The methods of training and standards of behavior for knights in the middle ages. The code of chivalry emphasized bravery, military skill, generosity in victory, piety, and courtesy to women.

Ephesians 5:28-29 says, “So husbands ought also to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his own wife loves himself; for no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ also does the church, because we are members of his body.

Ephesians 5:33 says, “Nevertheless each individual among you also is love to his own wife even as himself..”

The first point is to be married is to be intimately connected with your spouse. Husbands are to love their wives as their own bodies. The husband is the head and the wife is the body. The head cannot function without the body and the body cannot function without the head. The head and body work together to function properly. Marriage is an ultimate sport. You have to communicate and work as a team or the connection will fail and the marriage will die. In the same way, men need to listen to their head but they also need to consider the feelings of their bodies (wives) when it comes to making decisions so they can move forward and have an effective marriage.
I know I am a single woman I am in no way shape or form really able to give married couples marriage advice. But I know that without communication and teamwork marriage would be really hard, and quite impossible. This point doesn’t just talk to married couples. It also speaks about Christ and to the Church. Christ is the head and should be the center of our lives. We are the body of Christ. As the body we should be able to communicate with our creator, our leader, and our head. Just like couples should be able communicate intimately and connect intimately, us as the body of Christ should be intimately connected to our maker. He pursues us. Like a gentlemen should. Like husbands should do even after they are married to their wives. Pursue her daily. Just like Christ pursues us daily. That’s chivalrous. Love her as much as you love yourself.

The second point is Physical Abuse is a violation of the marriage covenant. Abuse goes against God’s plan. Intentionally injuring your body is a violation of how God created you. And abusing your wife physically is a violation of how God created marriage. Abuse of any kind is illogical, irrational, unacceptable, goes against the way we were made. If a guy you like, are seeing, dating, married to whatever, if he abuses you in any way seriously consider getting out of the relationship. We are princesses. God made us beautiful, lovely, smart, comforters, caretakers, and irresistible to men. God wants his princesses to be pursued loved, cared for like he cares for the church. He doesn’t want us being abused. Speaking from experience, I haven’t been married but I almost married a man who was not only physically abusive but controlling, manipulative, mentally, and emotionally abusive. God answered a lot of prayers and got me out of that relationship. I am very thankful. Abuse is not God’s plan.

The husband is to be the primary provider for his family. Deep within the masculine DNA is the God given desire to nourish and cherish their wives. As a single, when I go on dates or consider dating a guy I need to look at if he is not in a position to provide for a family I should either keep dating him but take it slow and wait, or end the relationship. I have to be able to be with a man who can provide for a family someday. Couples that are dating the guys should pay for the dinner and if a guy cannot afford to buy don’t go out. Men should prioritize their spending. God wants women to be cherished even if that means the guy pays. If the woman offers to pay then awesome she is blessing you, but you should never ask her to pay. Men should get used to being the providers for their woman and their family. Most say oh this is just old fashioned now, feminism destroyed this outlook. No it didn’t unless you let it. This isn’t dead nor is it old fashioned. Just as a husband should nourish his wife, Christ the head will nourish his bride which is the body of Christ.

In 1st Peter 3:7 “You husbands in the same way live with your wives in an understanding way, as with someone weaker since she is the woman..” The bible does say women are weaker. It does not say we aren’t equal partners in marriage, doesn’t mean men should take advantage of women or think they have the upper hand. What it does mean is men are the leaders of the household and wives are to be submissive to their husband. This leads us into the last point. Chivalry is a part of God’s plan. As men, God calls husbands to honor their wives when they serve them with their strength. Men are to protect and guard their wives, gfs, mothers, children, etc. God calls men to protect women. To honor, cherish, and nurture their wives. Whether that means doing the dishes for your wife or holding a door open for a girl you are on a date with. Respect women. God calls men to be chivalrous. He wants men to cherish and honor women. So to answer the question is chivalry really dead? It definitely isn’t. I believe sex outside of marriage may have tainted chivalry a little but it is not dead.

I believe that God just really spoke to me through this sermon. I know I am not a married woman, not even close but God did speak through this sermon. He spoke to me about what I should be looking for in a mate, what I should not be looking for, that respectful men do exist even when they seem rare in a sex driven culture like ours, and that I should seek men who want to cherish me not tear me down. I want to be intimately connected not only to my maker but to my future hubby someday, I want to stay clear of abuse and know the warning of signs of abuse and listen to God when a relationship needs to end, seek a man who knows that he needs to be the primary provider for my household, and that I should seek a man who wants to nourish and cherish me someday.

Be encouraged.

His beloved,
Gigi

Valentines Day

Today is Valentines Day, as you have probably noticed. The infamous ''hallmark holiday". The day where guys are supposed to spoil their girlfriends with flowers, chocolates, gifts, and dinner. I will admit I am a lil sad I don't have a boyfriend this year for the past three years I have been one of those spoiled girls who always had amazing valentines. But just because I am single doesn't mean I can't be happy on this day. I have lots of valentines who have always been there for me. Plus like I've said before and will say many times in the future, girls since when did we start letting boys determine our happiness.

I can create my own happiness. I am the happiest I have been in almost three years. It's funny, I wanted to be with someone so bad and when I finally got him I wasn't completely happy or completely satisfied and now that I don't have ''anyone" I am the happiest I have been since high school. I am not saying staying single the rest of my life is going to make me happy, but I have to learn to find happiness on my own before anyone else can make me truely happy. So yes it is single awareness day but I am not going to be a negative nancy about it. I am happy for everyone who has a significant other and is being spoiled on this day. You are very blessed and I hope to be blessed with an amazing husband someday who cherishes me not only on Valentines day but everyday of the year.

I am choosing to be thankful on this Valentines Day. Thankful for my loving family who have been through thick and thin with me through the past three years and are finally seeing a light at the tunnel. I am thankful for amazing friends who are always there for me whether its in the good times or bad times. Thankful for an adorable puppy who wants nothing to be faithful to me, he hasn't left my side today. He's actually sleeping on my lap as I am typing this. Now that's love and loyalty. I am thankful for a beautiful savior, my first love. Who fills my heart with so much joy and wants nothing but the best for me. He pursues me all the time. He is my first love and nobody will replace him. Never. Not even my future hubby someday. I am so thankful that my grandma is getting released from the hospital today to go back to the nursing home so she can get her strength back and go to an assisted living home. Just shows how strong God's love is for us and that he does answer prayers and is faithful. God wants us to imitate him. I believe by showing love for people, not only on valentines day, but 365 days a year ,is imitating him. So there is so much to be thankful for. I am trying to fall in love with as many things as possible because this life is so short and I don't want to miss out on anything.

Be happy. Let Jesus fill your heart with joy.

Gigi

Blessings

"Blessings" by Laura Story


We pray for blessings
We pray for peace
Comfort for family, protection while we sleep
We pray for healing, for prosperity
We pray for Your mighty hand to ease our suffering
All the while, You hear each spoken need
Yet love is way too much to give us lesser things

'Cause what if your blessings come through raindrops
What if Your healing comes through tears
What if a thousand sleepless nights are what it takes to know You're near
What if trials of this life are Your mercies in disguise

We pray for wisdom
Your voice to hear
We cry in anger when we cannot feel You near
We doubt your goodness, we doubt your love
As if every promise from Your Word is not enough
All the while, You hear each desperate plea
And long that we'd have faith to believe

When friends betray us
When darkness seems to win
We know that pain reminds this heart
That this is not our home

What if my greatest disappointments
Or the aching of this life
Is the revealing of a greater thirst this world can't satisfy
What if trials of this life
The rain, the storms, the hardest nights
Are your mercies in disguise

This song is really speaking to me this morning when I'm just dwelling in the prescence of my papa. He loves me so. He pursues me even in my darkest moments. He pursues me in my happy moments. He's always pursuing my heart. He's my first love. I tend to forget that.

Last week I went to a funeral for a guy I graduated with. It was very hard to say bye to him. I didn't really know him well but I was in band with him and I had a few classes with him. It is very hard to say bye to someone who is my age. It reminds me time and time again how precious life is, how beautiful it is no matter what kind of pain I go through, and how it is very short.No matter how hard this is for me to understand, why someone's life was cut so short, I am reminded that God has a plan. He has a plan. We can question that plan, questioning him doesn't make us any less of a believer, it just shows we want to know him and gain a better understanding of who he is. All I know is that God needed an angel up in heaven with him, and that angel was Ryan. This song was played at his funeral and it has been in my head ever since.

I believe God is speaking to me in several ways through this song.

'Cause what if your blessings come through raindrops
What if Your healing comes through tears
What if a thousand sleepless nights are what it takes to know You're near
What if trials of this life are Your mercies in disguise

This is my favorite part of the song it speaks to me and speaks to my core, to my soul. I have cried thousands and thousands of teardrops in the last year. This has been one of the most trying times of my life. I had several sleepless nights due to heartbreak, loss, brokenness, and aching in my heart due to the pain this world has caused me and will continue to cause me. My family and I have been put through so much pain and trials in the last year. Just when I thought they would get better my family is being hit with yet another trial. But God isn't trying to punish us. These are blessings even if it doesn't seem like that at the time. This last year has been a trying time for all of us. My mom just recently told me about all of the weeping and crying she did for me over the past year, well past three years, but especially this year and the years I was involved with my ex.

God works in mysterious ways. I don't always know his plan but I have faith in his timing and trust in his will. My mom not only told me about all the praying and weeping she has done for me, but also that this song was always in her head when she was thinking about me and the struggles we have been through.I have cried time and time again over this song, as she has. God has linked us together through this song. Bringing us back together, to the friendship we had before all of this crap happened. This is a blessing. Such a beautiful blessing. My mom was my best friend all throughout my life. She was my go to person. God really blessed me with an amazing, beautiful, strong woman of God for a mother. It has taken me alot of time to remember that and to remember just how blessed I truely am.

This song was and still is very encouraging to me. God continues to speak to me through it. I know he is by my side and will never leave me, even if I get sad and angry and feel like he has abandoned me. I know that he is working in not only my life, but my whole families lives. It's very beautiful to see the Lord work.

I hope you are encouraged, because I was :)


His beloved,

Gigi